Whether you’re planning a wedding or living together for the first time, it’s really exciting! There’s so much to look forward to, but what about the big issues? Well, my advice is to deal with as much as you can before you take the plunge. With that in mind, here are five topics to discuss before getting married or moving in together.
Top Five Topics To Talk About Before Marriage
1. Are you going to plan for children?
The big one. The really big one. Are you going to be parents? And if you are, how can you be the best parents that you can be? This is something that can’t remain as an elephant in the room forever.
You’ll have to have the chat about whether you both want kids or not at some point and, often, the earlier you do that the better. Be open to your partner’s expectations and wants, and remember that minds can change over time too. As long as you keep an open dialogue you’ll both always know where you stand.
2. Deal with some of the practicalities
There’s going to be so much fun to enjoy during your lives together, but there are a few practicalities to talk through first. These are things like what you both expect of each other in the home, feelings about contingency plans such as buying life insurance, and thoughts about childcare. Who’ll take time off work to raise the kids? For more info about paternity leave for men, click here.
These are just a few of the details you’ll want to get straight at the outset, and there’ll be plenty more that crop up along the way. Get some of them out of the way early and then start planning for the fun stuff.
3. Financial planning
Money’s an awkward topic for some, but you can overcome that early on. Chat about how you want to work and organize your money. Are you a spreadsheet-type person? Do you like to spend big on experiences and holidays? Are you a saver? It’s good for you to lay out how you feel about financial planning and open that discussion early.
Explaining your views is one thing, but it’s also vital that you really listen to your partner too. Find out what their expectations and ideas are about money. Start on the right foot and you will reduce the risk of money being a problem later on in the relationship.
4. Discuss life goals and intentions
Your major goals are another area you should take the time to talk about. These aspects of life include things like whether you want to put down roots in one place or move around. The type of job you want and the commitment that could entail. How much involvement do you each have with your own families? By talking about these things early you can put it all out there and get on the same page.
5. Factor in the fun
You’ve dealt with the big questions about family, the practicalities like paternity leave for men, finances, and life plans, so now it’s onto the fun stuff. It’s time to talk about the experiences you’d like to have together – a bucket list if you will. Bungee jumping, safari, learning how to salsa dance… this is a chance to kick back from the heavy stuff and enjoy looking forward to all the great times you’re going to have together.
And there you have it, five topics to discuss with your partner before you move in together or take that trip down the aisle.